Themselves vs Themself: Mastering Reflexive Pronouns in Modern English

Language shapes how we see the world, and even the smallest words can spark big debates. One such debate centers on Themselves vs Themself. At first glance, the difference seems minor—just a couple of letters. Yet this tiny shift carries weight in grammar, clarity, and even identity. Writers, students, and professionals often pause when choosing between the two, unsure which form fits their sentence.

Traditionally, “themselves” serves as the standard reflexive form for plural subjects, while “themself” has appeared far less often in formal writing. However, modern usage is evolving. As singular “they” becomes widely accepted in everyday and professional communication, “themself” is gaining attention as a logical singular reflexive option. Style guides, editors, and linguists continue to discuss its role in contemporary English.

Understanding Themselves vs Themself is more than a grammar lesson—it’s about writing with precision and respect. When you know the rules and the context behind them, you communicate more clearly. In this guide, you’ll explore definitions, examples, and practical tips to confidently choose the correct form every time you write.

Understanding Reflexive Pronouns

Reflexive pronouns point back to the subject of a sentence. They usually end in -self (singular) or -selves (plural).

Examples:

  • I taught myself to play guitar.
  • She blamed herself for the mistake.
  • They congratulated themselves on finishing the project.
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Here’s a quick reference table for common reflexive pronouns:

SingularPlural
myselfourselves
yourselfyourselves
himselfthemselves
herselfthemselves
itselfthemselves
themselfthemselves

Notice that themself appears only in singular usage. That’s where it gets confusing.

Reflexive pronouns serve three main purposes:

  1. Emphasize the subject: “She herself fixed the issue.”
  2. Show that the action affects the subject: “They blamed themselves.”
  3. Clarify for singular they: “Someone left themself behind.”

Themselves – Standard Usage

Themselves is the standard plural reflexive pronoun. You’ll use it when referring to more than one person or thing.

Correct examples:

  • The students taught themselves to code.
  • The cats groomed themselves after lunch.
  • Employees often challenge themselves to meet targets.

Tips for using themselves:

  • Always match the pronoun with a plural subject.
  • Avoid pairing it with singular they unless style guides allow it.
  • Works in formal and informal writing.

Common mistakes:

  • Incorrect: “Someone left themselves behind.”
  • Correct: “Someone left themself behind.” (singular usage, modern English)

Themself – Singular They Usage

Themself is the reflexive pronoun for singular they, which is increasingly accepted in modern English. This is especially useful for gender-neutral language.

Examples:

  • Each student should challenge themself.
  • If someone wants to improve, themself must commit to practice.
  • The winner congratulated themself quietly.

Style guide perspective:

  • Merriam-Webster: Acceptable in informal writing.
  • APA (7th edition): Acceptable for singular they.
  • Chicago Manual of Style: Recognizes it cautiously.

Note: While “themself” is grammatically correct in singular they constructions, some readers may still find it unusual. Use it thoughtfully in formal documents.

The Difference Between Themselves and Themself

PronounUsageExamples
themselvesPlural subjectsThey blamed themselves for the error.
themselfSingular they (gender-neutral)Someone left themself out of the meeting.

Key takeaway:

  • Themselves = plural, traditional
  • Themself = singular, modern usage with singular they

Why Themself Sounds Strange to Some Readers

Themself feels odd because it’s new. English has traditionally resisted singular forms of plural pronouns.

  • Before the 21st century, most style guides recommended avoiding “themself.”
  • Modern usage embraces inclusivity and gender-neutral language.
  • Readers unfamiliar with singular they may pause or question usage.
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Despite this, “themself” is gaining traction in journals, articles, and books. Using it correctly shows awareness of contemporary English.

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How to Use Themselves Correctly

  1. Identify a plural subject.
  2. Use themselves to show the action reflects back.
  3. Avoid replacing it with singular constructions.

Examples:

  • The committee members congratulated themselves on completing the project.
  • Dogs often clean themselves after meals.
  • Volunteers pushed themselves to finish the fundraiser.

Quick tip: If your subject can be replaced with “they,” “themselves” is usually correct.

How to Use Themself Correctly

  1. Use when referring to singular they.
  2. Make sure the context is clear to avoid confusion.
  3. Include optional clarifying details if necessary.

Examples:

  • Everyone should ask themself if they are ready.
  • Each contestant introduced themself confidently.
  • Someone forgot to bring themself a notebook.

Practical tip: If your audience is formal or traditional, consider rephrasing:

  • Original: “Each student should prepare themself.”
  • Alternative: “Each student should prepare themselves.” (still widely accepted informally)

Common Mistakes and How to Fix Them

MistakeWhy it’s wrongCorrected Version
Someone left themselves behind.Singular subject needs singular reflexive pronounSomeone left themself behind.
Everyone blamed themself.Some style guides still see it as nonstandardEveryone blamed themselves (informally acceptable)
The group congratulated themself.Plural subject cannot use singular reflexiveThe group congratulated themselves

Tip: When in doubt, check the subject number and whether singular is intended.

Style Guide Recommendations

  • APA 7th Edition: Accepts singular they and themself.
  • Merriam-Webster: Recognizes “themself” as correct in singular they usage.
  • Chicago Manual of Style: Advises caution; prefers “themselves” for clarity.
  • AP Style: Still leans toward “themselves” for singular subjects.
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Takeaway: Adapt to your audience. Academic or professional papers may require traditional forms, while modern blogs or inclusive writing can use themself.

Inclusive Language Considerations

Using themself aligns with gender-neutral writing. Singular they and themself:

  • Respect individuals who don’t identify as he or she.
  • Avoid awkward constructions like “himself or herself.”
  • Fit naturally in sentences like: “If anyone wants to improve, themself must commit to practice.”

Example in professional writing:

  • Incorrect: “Each employee should review himself or herself.”
  • Correct: “Each employee should review themself.”

Inclusive language enhances clarity and respects diversity in communication.

Quick Reference Rules

  • Themselves: Use for plural subjects (the team congratulated themselves).
  • Themself: Use for singular they (someone left themself out).
  • Avoid mixing singular and plural reflexive pronouns.
  • If unsure, rephrase sentence for clarity.
  • For formal writing, default to “themselves” unless singular they is intentional.

Exercises and Practice Sentences

Fill in the blanks with themselves or themself:

  • Every student should bring ___ to the class.
  • The cats cleaned ___ after dinner.
  • Someone forgot to introduce ___ at the meeting.
  • The volunteers congratulated ___ for finishing early.
  • Each participant should ask ___ if they understand the instructions.

Answers:

  • themself
  • themselves
  • themself
  • themselves
  • themself

These exercises help internalize correct reflexive pronoun usage in both plural and singular contexts.

FAQs

Is “themself” ever correct?

Yes. It is correct when using singular they and reflects modern, inclusive language.

Can “themselves” be used with singular they?

Informally, yes. But some purists prefer “themself” to match singular usage.

What do professional editors prefer?

Most still favor “themselves” for clarity, but acceptance of “themself” is growing, especially in blogs and inclusive writing.

How to avoid awkward phrasing?

Rewriting sentences or using plural forms where possible ensures clarity.

Is “themself” officially recognized?

Yes, dictionaries like Merriam-Webster now list it, and style guides such as APA 7th edition accept it.

Conclusion

In the end, the debate over Themselves vs Themself comes down to clarity, context, and audience. “Themselves” remains the standard reflexive form for plural subjects and is widely accepted in formal writing. Meanwhile, “themself” continues to gain ground as a singular reflexive form, especially when referring to singular “they.” Language evolves, and this shift reflects how English adapts to real-world usage.

The key is simple: know your subject, understand your style guide, and write with purpose. If you’re addressing a plural group, “themselves” is the safe and traditional choice. If you’re using singular “they” and aiming for inclusivity or logical consistency, “themself” may be appropriate depending on your audience and context.

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